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Hyrja
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Thoughts, ideas, wishes, dreams, whatever u like, in english.

Thoughts, ideas, wishes, dreams, whatever u like, in english.

· 1418 · 48327

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MistreciaTironse
#100 ne: 06-10-2004, 17:42:08
Smiley i'm ok,thnx for caring sis.
Ace is around what r u talking about?
Hehe he's been much more around other themes,but still,he's been absent here

Right Ace?


Hope u have a nice day everybody!
Enjoy life,don't let it go! :) :pafshim

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aceofhearts
#101 ne: 06-10-2004, 19:13:50
The SPACES between ur FINGERS were created so that another person's fingers would fill them in. Hope U found the hand that u r meant 2 hold on 4ever.......

I just love this phrase so much ....

And finally hi Milanistja :lule   and hi Smiley   :lule  
I have been around, majbe not here to write but i have been here to read what you guys write :occ, because seriously i enjoy reading your thoughts and ideas  :)
Anyway i will try to share more of my ideas and thoughts with you i am also trying to find a better way then writing ...eeee i am gonna try telepathy like ufos  :et :et   we'll se how that works  :P
« Editimi i fundit: 06-10-2004, 19:18:31 nga aceofhearts »

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aceofhearts
#102 ne: 08-10-2004, 19:52:40
Driving ....it's like having your own world behind the steering weel ....hearing the song of your choice without having anyone to interupt u from enjoying the moment alone.
Last night i was coming back home from work and over the hills ahead of me there was a quarter moon that seemed to be laying there ... quitely and beautlifuly over the far away hills .....i was driving towards it and it seemed like i was getting closer but i knew i was never gonna get close enough...
That was a sight for sore eyes ...i couldn't get enough of it, but it stopped when the ride came to an end!
 :pafshim
« Editimi i fundit: 10-10-2004, 20:03:43 nga aceofhearts »

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SmiLey
#103 ne: 13-10-2004, 11:56:37
I woke up this morning thinking...->>>
The sharing of joy, whether physical, emotional, psychic, or intellectual, forms a bridge between the sharers which can be the basis for understanding much of what is not shared between them, and lessens the threat of their difference...
... whereas, faith is an excitement and an enthusiasm: it is a condition of intellectual magnificence to which we must cling as to a treasure, and not squander on our way through life in the small coin of empty words, or in exact and priggish argument.


 :pafshim :pafshim

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fiona
#104 ne: 17-10-2004, 14:28:52
sometimes i think you don't understand even yourselfe,and then you want me ti understand you :-\ :-\ :-\

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SmiLey
#105 ne: 17-10-2004, 14:42:10
sometimes i think you don't understand even yourselfe,and then you want me ti understand you :-\


.... is that so...? wowwwwwww shocking... :D
Why, my dear, doesn't it happen 2 u not to understand urself sometimes... :???
Or nooo wait, let me guess ;)....u must be someone who knows everything there is to know in this world :tym

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fiona
#106 ne: 18-10-2004, 01:26:42
yes u said it SOMETIMES,not ALL THE TIME :D :pafshim :pafshim

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SmiLey
#107 ne: 18-10-2004, 01:43:46
exactly my dear, you've proven my point :occ

Good night!
 :pafshim


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fiona
#108 ne: 18-10-2004, 04:21:36
ok, MY DEAR! if u say so :occ :pafshim :pafshim

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Solist
#109 ne: 18-10-2004, 18:18:54
Sometimes i wish i was a better person..Not for me for the people who deserve it...
But most of the time the feeling is i wish i was a way more sophisticated son of ya'll know what... Man people are  so damn anoying randomly..You cant even try to be nice couse reality slams in your face big sh!t time.... Who the hell needs optimism anyway? Isnt it supossed to be @$$kising ttrying to be nice when you feel like slamind the door on someone face... Teachers for example..everyone is nice and kewl with thamm but all feel like "Can't wait till class is over i can't stand dis beatch no mo...." Life is all a bunch of Bull crap anyway...if u think of it.... Wouldnt life be better if you would be able to walk the street and tell a cop...hey dude get some freacking pills and lose some weight you fu(ck fat....
Life is like the New York METS... and do you guys no what METS means?

METS---> My Entire Team Stinks............. ...BiG TiMe :D
« Editimi i fundit: 18-10-2004, 18:21:03 nga Bizelja »

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MistreciaTironse
#110 ne: 22-10-2004, 21:52:45
Life is a......... we have to live it anyway... :(

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SmiLey
#111 ne: 23-10-2004, 11:18:03
I don't understand... what in the world has happened to you two, 'Bizelja' & 'Milanistja'... :???
You two, quite often seem so so damn pessimistic :o
Whyyyyyy is that so?  :(
Whattt, the world is at the edge for you both, to have still some happiness and joy in your life...?
There are no classes in life for beginners: right away you are always asked to deal with what is most difficult. And as you grow to understand life less and less, you learn to love it more and more.
So come on now, cheer up, both of you..., it doesn't help being so moody and pessimistic about life :occ

"One way to get the most out of life is to look upon it as an adventure" --- William Feather



Best regards
 :pafshim

  • Postime: 51
DearthGory
#112 ne: 23-10-2004, 18:37:31
"Dick Cheney feels responsible for his daughter being a lesbian because growing up, she heard him say 'go f--k yourself' so many times, she finally tried it"-- Bill Maher
"Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity"... Albert Einstein
Worrysome is like a rocking chair, it gives us something to do but it takes us nowhere!- .....Dearthgory
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens  -Jimi Hendrix-
"If a Man be gracious and courteous to strangers, it shows he is a citizen of the world and that his heart is no island, cut off from other Lands, but is a continent that joins them."
And they will not have passed across my life in vain, if from this brief record some few readers learn a truer insight into the character of the mountain tribesman."----Edith Durham referring to her travels across Northern Albania at the beginning of the 20th century.
Fat, lazy and stupid is no way to go through life son.-- Animal House
 ÃƒÆ’‡do fillim i keq, e ka mbarimin e keq. kofsh bektesh, merre vesh....
"Being lectured by the president on fiscal responsibility is a little bit like Tony Soprano talking to me about law and order in this country." -John Kerry
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence - Xenocrates
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment, it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." ----> Former U.S. Vice President, Dan Quayle
I  think that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman.â€" The Terminator
Democracy, the decietful theory that the jew would insinuate. Namely that all men are created equal. --Adolf Hitler - Mein Kampf
ONCE A KING ALWAYS A KING, BUT ONCE A KNIGHT IS NEVER ENOUGH.........lol
"More Muslims have died at the hands of killers than â€" I say more Muslims â€" a lot of Muslims have died â€" I don't know the exact count â€" at Istanbul. Look at these different places around the world where there's been tremendous death and destruction because killers kill".
- George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004
He is dumn<< I'll end it with him!!! so u could have a laugh after all!
No i got a better one
"IT FELT GOOD DAMMIT" Bill Clinton on his affair
Hope u like the!

  • Postime: 5949
SmiLey
#113 ne: 29-10-2004, 11:12:39
         WOMEN  Ãƒâ€š :lule


They smile when they want to scream.

They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in.

They stand up for injustice.

They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without new shoes so their children can have them.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about a birth or a new marriage.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They have sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all SIZES, in all colors

They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin!  <)>

Women do more than just give birth.

They bring joy and hope.  <>

They give compassion and ideals.

They give moral support to their family and friends.

Women have a lot to say and a lot to give.


We got off the Titanic first..   :D

We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.  :P

Taxis stop for us.  :D

We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.

We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.

If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear.

We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

We have the ability to dress ourselves.

We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.  ;)

If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

We'll never regret piercing our ears.

We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence, because they aren't listening anyway.
« Editimi i fundit: 29-10-2004, 11:14:20 nga Smiley »

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camarroke
#114 ne: 29-10-2004, 13:19:18
 Just a little piece from Pushkini:

"It's Time, My Friend..."
It's time, my friend, it's time! The peace is craved by hearts...  
Days flow after days -- each hour departs
A bit of life -- and both, you and I,
Plan a long life, but could abruptly die.

The world hasn't happiness, but there is freedom, peace.
And long have I daydreamed the life of bliss --
And long have planned, a tired slave, the flight
To the removed abode of labor and delight.  

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TREMENS
#115 ne: 27-12-2004, 07:26:27
Doors - Awake Ghost Song Lyrics



Is everybody in?
 Is everybody in?
 Is everybody in?
 The ceremony is about to begin.

Wake up!

You can?t remember where it was
Had this dream stopped?

 Awake

Shake dreams from your hair
My pretty child, my sweet one.
Choose the day and choose the sign of your day
The days divinity
First thing you see.

A vast radiant beach in a cool jeweled moon
Couples naked race down by it?s quiet side
And we laugh like soft, mad children
Smug in the wooly cotton brains of infancy
The music and voices are all around us.
Choose they croon the ancient ones
The time has come again
Choose now, they croon
Beneath the moon
Beside an ancient lake
Enter again the sweet forest
Enter the hot dream
Come with us
Everything is broken up and dances.


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SmiLey
#116 ne: 01-01-2005, 15:04:51
A WISH

I have just deposit into year 2005 account, wishes for 365 days of happiness, peace, success, love & a hug for each day!

Wish you 'ALL' Great Start for January,
Love for February,
Inner peace for March,
No worries for April,
Fun for May,
Joy for June up till November,
Happiness for December.

Have a lucky & a wonderful 2005!
Wishing you A Happy New Year! :)


 <)> <)> <)>

  • Postime: 5949
SmiLey
#117 ne: 13-02-2005, 10:21:16
Some jokes just to cheer u up ppl :P...
 

TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." :D

____________

TEACHER: Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables! ;)

_____________

TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile?"
JOHN: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong!
JOHN: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it! :lalala

___________

TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
SARAH: H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!

_____________

TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: George! <)>

______________

TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WILLIE: Me! :D

______________

TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. :hahaha

______________

TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."
ELLEN: I is...
TEACHER: No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."
ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

_____________

TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
JOHNNY: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

_____________

TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
JOHNNY: "Because George still had the ax in his hand."

_____________

TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SAM: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

_______________

TEACHER: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
DESMOND: No, teacher, it's the same dog!

______________

TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PUPIL: A teacher.
 

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Hatixhe
#118 ne: 13-02-2005, 14:20:34
YOUR CHARACTER BASED ON YOUR BIRTH MONTH  



Here is a good source to check your character/personality based on the month you were born. I am sure at least 75% of this would apply to your characteristics and the other may be for someone else born in the same month. Enjoy and have fun.

 JANUARY
 Ambitious and serious
 Loves to teach and be taught
 Always looking at people's flaws and weaknesses
 Likes to criticise
 Hardworking and productive
 Smart, neat and organised
 Sensitive and has deep thoughts
 Knows how to make others happy
 Quiet unless excited or tensed
 Rather reserved
 Highly attentive
 Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds
 Romantic but has difficulties expressing love
 Loves children
 Homely person
 Loyal
 Needs to improve social abilities
 Easily jealous


 FEBRUARY
 Abstract thoughts
 Loves reality and abstract
 Intelligent and clever
 Changing personality
 Temperamental
 Quiet, shy and humble
 Low self esteem
 Honest and loyal
 Determined to reach goals
 Loves freedom
 Rebellious when restricted
 Loves aggressiveness
 Too sensitive and easily hurt
 Showing anger easily
 Dislike unnecessary things
 Loves making friends but rarely shows it
 Daring and stubborn
 Ambitious
 Realising dreams and hopes
 Sharp
 Loves entertainment and leisure
 Romantic on the inside not outside
 Supersticious and ludicrous
 Spendthrift
 Learns to show emotions


 MARCH
 Attractive personality
 Affectionate
 Shy and reserved
 Secretive
 Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic
 Loves peace and serenity
 Sensitive to others
 Loves to serve others
 Not easily angered
 Trustworthy
 Appreciative and returns kindness
 Observant and assess others
 Revengeful
 Loves to dream and fantasize
 Loves travelling
 Loves attention
 Hasty decisions in choosing partners
 Loves home decors
 Musically talented
 Loves special things
 Moody


 APRIL
 Active and dynamic
 Desicive and haste but tends to regret
 Attractive and affectionate to oneself
 Strong mentality
 Loves attention
 Diplomatic
 Consoling
 Friendly and solves people's problems
 Brave and fearless
 Adventurous
 Loving and caring
 Suave and generous
 Emotional
 Revengeful
 Agressive
 Hasty
 Good memory
 Moving
 Motivate oneself and the others
 Sickness usually of the head and chest
 Easily get too jealous


 MAY
 Stubborn and hard-hearted
 Strong-willed and highly motivated
 Sharp thoughts
 Easily angered
 Attracts others and loves attention
 Deep feelings
 Beautiful physically and mentally
 Firm standpoint
 Easily influenced
 Needs no motivation
 Easily consoled
 Systematic (left brain)
 Loves to dream
 Strong clairvoyance
 Understanding
 Sickness usually in the ear and neck
 Good imagination
 Good debating skills
 Good physical
 Weak breathing
 Loves literature and the arts
 Loves travelling
 Dislike being at home
 Restless
 Hardworking
 High spirited
 Spendthrift


 JUNE
 Thinks far with vision
 Easily influenced by kindness
 Polite and soft-spoken
 Having lots of ideas
 Sensitive
 Active mind
 Hesitating
 Tends to delay
 Choosy and always wants the best
 Temperamental
 Funny and humorous
 Loves to joke
 Good debating skills
 Talkative
 Daydreamer
 Friendly
 Knows how to make friends
 Abiding
 Able to show character
 Easily hurt
 Prone to getting colds
 Loves to dress up
 Easily bored
 Fussy
 Seldom show emotions
 Takes time to recover when hurt
 Brand conscious
 Executive
 Stubborn
 Those who love me are enemies
 Those who hate me are friends


 JULY
 Fun to be with
 Secretive
 Difficult to fathom and to be understood
 Quiet unless excited or tensed
 Takes pride in oneself
 Has reputation
 Easily consoled
 Honest
 Concern about people's feelings
 Tactful
 Friendly
 Approachable
 Very emotional
 Tempramental and unpredictable
 Moody and easily hurt
 Witty and sarky
 Sentimental
 Not revengeful
 Forgiving but never forgets
 Dislike nonsensical and unnecessary things
 Guides others physically and mentally
 Sensitive and forms impressions carefully
 Caring and loving
 Treats others equally
 Strong sense of sympathy
 Wary and sharp
 Judge people through observations
 Hardworking
 No difficulties in studying
 Loves to be alone
 Always broods about the past and the old friends
 Likes to be quiet
 Homely person
 Waits for friends
 Never looks for friends
 Not aggressive unless provoked
 Prone to having stomach and dieting problems
 Loves to be loved
 Easily hurt but takes long to recover
 Overly concerned
 Puts in effort in work


 AUGUST
 Loves to joke
 Attractive
 Suave and caring
 Brave and fearless
 Firm and has leadership qualities
 Knows how to console others
 Too generous and egoistic
 Taked high pride of oneself
 Thirsty for praises
 Extraodinary spirit
 Easily angered
 Angry when provoked
 Easily jealous
 Observant
 Careful and cautious
 Thinks quickly
 Independent thoughts
 Loves to lead and to be led
 Loves to dream
 Talented in the arts, music and defence
 Sensitive but not petty
 Poor resistance against illnesses
 Learns to relax
 Hasty and rushy
 Romantic
 Loving and caring
 Loves to make friends


 SEPTEMBER
 Suave and compromising
 Careful, cautious and organised
 Likes to point out people's mistakes
 Likes to criticize
 Quiet but able to talk well
 Calm and cool
 Kind and sympathetic
 Concerned and detailed
 Trustworthy, loyal and honest
 Does work well
 Sensitive
 Thinking
 Good memory
 Clever and knowledgeable
 Loves to look for information
 Must control oneself when criticising
 Able to motivate oneself
 Understanding
 Secretive
 Loves sports, leisure and travelling
 Hardly shows emotions
 Tends to bottle up feelings
 Choosy especially in relationships
 Loves wide things
 Systematic


 OCTOBER
 Loves to chat
 Loves those who loves him
 Loves to takes things at the centre
 Attractive and suave
 Inner and physical beauty
 Does not lie or pretend
 Sympathetic
 Treats friends importantly
 Always making friends
 Easily hurt but recovers easily
 Bad tempered
 Selfish
 Seldom helps unless asked
 Daydreamer
 Very opinionated
 Does not care of what others think
 Emotional
 Decisive
 Strong clairvoyance
 Loves to travel, the arts and literature
 Soft-spoken, loving and caring
 Romantic
 Touchy and easily jealous
 Concerned
 Loves outdoors
 Just and fair
 Spendthrift and easily influenced
 Easily lose confidence


 NOVEMBER
 Has a lot of ideas
 Difficult to fathom
 Thinks forward
 Unique and brilliant
 Extraodinary ideas
 Sharp thinking
 Fine and strong clairvoyance
 Can become good doctors
 Careful and cautious
 Dynamic in personality
 Secretive
 Inquisitive
 Knows how to dig secrets
 Always thinking
 Less talkative but amiable
 Brave and generous
 Patient
 Stubborn and hard-hearted
 If there is a will, there is a way
 Determined
 Never give up
 Hardly become angry unless provoked
 Loves to be alone
 Thinks differently from others
 Sharp-minded
 Motivates oneself
 Does not appreciates praises
 High-spirited
 Well-built and tough
 Deep love and emotions
 Romantic
 Uncertain in relationships
 Homely
 Hardworking
 High abilities
 Trustworhty
 Honest and keeps secrets
 Not able to control emotions
 Unpredictable


 DECEMBER
 Loyal and generous
 Patriotic
 Active in games and interactions
 Impatient and hasty
 Ambitious
 Influential in organisations
 Fun to be with
 Loves to socialise
 Loves praises
 Loves attention
 Loves to be loved
 Honest and trustworthy
 Not pretending
 Short tempered
 Changing personality
 Not egoistic
 Takes high pride in oneself
 Hates restrictions
 Loves to joke
 Good sense of humor
 Logical



Une per vete i perkas muajit December. Se di  per ju te tjeret  :pafshim

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Hatixhe
#119 ne: 13-02-2005, 14:27:08
BOYS & GIRLS  



A heart is not a play thing,
a heart is not a toy,
but if you want it broken,
Just give it to a boy.

Boys they like to play with things
To see what makes them run,
But when it comes to kissing,
They do it just for fun.

Boys never give their hearts away
They play us girls for fools,
They wait untill we give our hearts
And then they play it cool.

You will wonder where he is at night
You will wonder if hes true,
One moment you will be happy,
One moment you will be blue.

If you get a chance to see him
Your heart begins to dance
Your life revolves around him,
Theres nothing like romance.

And then it starts to happen,
You worry day and night
You see, my friend, you're losing him
It never turns out right.

Boys are great, though immature
The price you pay is high,
He may seem sweet and gorgeous
But remember, hes a guy.

Don't fall in love with just a boy
That takes alot of nerve.
You see, my friend, you need a man
To get what you deserve.

So when you think that you're in love,
Be careful if you can
Before you give your heart away
Make sure that hes a man.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

GIRLS
There are many good things in life,
like cars, money, and weed.
But if you want something confusing,
a girl is all you need.

A girl doesn't say what she wants,
but you're somehow supposed to know.
If they want to do this or do that,
stay here, stay there, or just go.

Then there's the time, you all know what i mean,
that monthly little joy.
That lets them abuse the shit out of you,
just for being a boy.

If you ever dare look at another girl,
they seem to scream, go on, and panic.
But watch how fast they ignore you,
at the sight of that queer from Titanic.

They give you questions like "Am i fat?",
and "If you could go with one of my friends,who?".
There is no answer, face the facts,
you are definatly through.

They take nothing and blow it up,
and make a tremendous fuss.
So girls, no matter what you think,
you are just as hard to understand as us.


Ju pershendes te Gjitheve.... ;)

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Hatixhe
#120 ne: 13-02-2005, 14:33:11
Differences

 
A little girl grows up,
with a big yard and her pup.
They run and play
without a worry all day.
She goes to school,
obeying every rule.
Off to church every Sunday,
and plants flowers in the month of May.

A little boy grows up,
thinking that "Muffs Corrupt."
He hangs with his boys,
and his T-Bird, one of his favorite toys.
He loves his family, but sticks to the streets,
where violence he meets.
He goes to school,
where everyone knows he's cool.

They grew up with about 30 miles between them.
Neither knowing what the future would hold.
A boy so bold,
a girl so innocent,
off to college they went.

They each began their new life,
enduring pain and strife.
Some old, some new,
yet neither had a clue,
that one cold January day,
would bring them together in a different way.
They had met before,
but this time meant so much more.

They are closer than two birds of a feather,
with each time spent together.
Neither knows what is to be,
but she feels that it is he,
who melts her heart
She feels from him some apprehension,
so, their relationship she does not mention.
When the time is right,
he will quit the fight,
and follow hi heart to what it wishes.
She hopes it is her,
which it wants, but if it's not,
then whoever it is must care for and love him a lot.

I am writing this to you,
to tell you I love and care for you,
in a way that is so new.
I hope that you feel the same way too.
I know you don't like to label,
so, you don't have to put it on the table
the way you feel about me,
because I see it in your eyes,
that to me you'll never tell lies.
I know we have both built up a wall,
but I am ready for the fall.
And I will wait until you feel ready
to move those walls which are so heavy,
and let me in your heart.

I love you!!  

 :pafshim ;)

  • Postime: 5949
SmiLey
#121 ne: 16-02-2005, 17:30:59
                                  GOD vs SATAN

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts.  And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds.  And Satan smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.  And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."  And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.  And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, "I have sent you hearty healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."  And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.  And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good."  Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."

God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds.  And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.  And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.  And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them.  And Man gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef s o that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger.  Then said, "You want fries with that?"  And Man replied, "Yes!  And super size them!"  And Satan said, "It is good."  And Man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.


--- Thought for the day .... There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research :???. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

  • Postime: 5949
SmiLey
#122 ne: 16-02-2005, 17:34:51
I KNEW IT :P

(God speaking...)

"What's the problem, Eve."

"I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all these wonderful animals, as well as that silly snake, but I'm just not happy."

"And why is that, Eve ?"

"Lord, I'm lonely, and sick to death of apples."

"Well, in that case," said the Lord, "I have a solution.  I shall create 'Man' for you."

"Man? what is that Lord?" replies Eve.

"A flawed creature with many bad traits and habits.  He'll lie, cheat and be  vain.  All in all, he'll give you a hard time.  But he will be bigger,  faster and stronger than you and will like to hunt and kill things, so then you can eat other things than just apples."

"I'll even create him," continued the Lord, warming to his subject, "in such a way that he will satisfy your physical needs.  However he will be  basically witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and chasing and kicking little balls around.  He won't be anywhere near as  smart  as you, and so will need your advice to think properly"

"Sounds great," says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows, "but what's the  catch, Lord ?"

"Well....you can have him on one condition."

"And what's that Lord?"

"As I said, he'll be proud, vain and egotistical... so you'll have to let  him believe that I made him first. :lalala
And this will have to be our, own, individual little secret :occ... you know,  woman to woman <)>."

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camarroke
#123 ne: 17-02-2005, 08:48:03

hello everybody! :pafshim
I havev somethings to tell you:


and here we go.

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What's politics?"
Dad says, " Well son, let me try to explain it this way:
I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs so we'll call you the People. The nanny, we'll consider her he Working Class. Now your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense."
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him, and he finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to is parents' room and finds his mother fast asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.
The next morning, the little boy says to to his father, " I think I understand Politics now."
The father replies, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think it is."
The boy promptly answers, "Well, while Capitalism is ........ the Working Class, the Government is asleep, the People are being ignored, and the Future is in deep trouble."
 

 :D :D :D

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Hatixhe
#124 ne: 19-02-2005, 17:19:41


Kiss on the hand - I adore you.

Kiss on the cheek - I just want to be friends.

Kiss on the chin - You are cute!

Kiss on the neck - I want you.

Kiss on the lips - I love you.

Kiss on the ears - Let's have some fun.

Kiss anywhere else - You're the best.

 ;) ;)

 

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